WARNING: MEDICAL PROCEDURES DISCUSSED BELOW...just figured I'd say that in case the squeamish were reading.
Well, it's been awhile since anyone has blogged. Seriously, are Tess, Stephanie, and I the only ones who have amusing things happen to us. Andrew is in freaking Italy, yet no good stories? I find that hard to believe.
Anyways, I figured I better share about my latest adventure before I get washed away in the Great Storm of 2009 (that is what the newsman just called it....a bit of an overreaction, in my opinion...it is just a ton of rain). The picture below is around the corner from my house.
The Country Club where I work is closed on Monday so I was volunteered to take my father to the doctor today to have an endoscopy for some reflux issues. An endoscopy (thank the Lord) is when the doctor inserts a tube/camera through your throat to take photos of your stomach, esophagus, etc. The office where we were, however, also does colonoscopies which are endoscopies from the other end. After my father was prepped, I had to go back to sit with him to watch his things while he waited for the anesthetist and the procedure.
After my dad was rolled away, an elderly woman was brought back into the next room separated from me by a wall and a curtain. She clearly had just had a colonoscopy judging by the conversation she was having with her husband, the doctor, and the recovery nurse. Apparently after such a procedure, the nurse's job is to encourage the patient to pass as much gas as possible immediately. Like, this woman put myself or Coleman to shame on a good day. Sitting alone in my room, I started to giggle (NO PRIVACY) until the woman said this little gem, "I think that was a little more than gas." My giggle almost immediately turned into a vomit puddle on the middle of the floor until the woman began to continuosly pass gas again. It was as if she had sat on the world's biggest whoopie cushion, and there was no end in sight. It was horrible, and I couldn't figure out why they forced me to sit alone back in the room while my dad was not even there.
Thankfully, soon after, my heavily asleep father was wheeled back into the room. After kind of waking up and sitting up at a 90-degree angle because he couldn't quite figure out how to sit up correctly, my dad IMMEDIATELY began to argue about "Obama-care" with me in front of the nurse and how the hospital would soon change into a giant Red Cross shelter/"sick bay" for people who can't afford real care and come to the doctor for everything. Really, the first thing you do after coming off of drugs is argue with your liberal son about the President?! Come on, Dad. I told him to be quiet and to pay attention to the nurse.
He then asked for 8 more doses of meds so that he could sleep when he got home (presumedly so he didn't have to deal with B&T). He also kept saying how the meds didn't effect him, but that it made my mom crazy, or according to him, "You know how she gets after she's had a couple of drinks."
It was quite the adventure, and I was so happy that my dad's procedure was the one that was not followed by instructions to pass as much gas as possible. The nurse asked the woman next door to use her husband as a "target," and I probably would have punched her in the baby-maker had she even begun to suggest that to my father.
Cobb County Schools and my Club are closed tomorrow so my mother and I have to spend the whole day together with B&T. Certainly something entertaining has to come out of it. I just felt we needed some sort of update as it had been nearly a month! Congrats to all the Mississippi people who passed the Bar Exam!! The rest of us, god-willing, will be joining you shortly.
